Twas the Night Before Christmas

by | Dec 24, 2022 | Back Blasts

QIC: Belding
PAX POSTED: Seltzer, Grouper, Cricket, Tebow, Malware, Belding

It felt like the North Pole at the Bone Yard as 7:30 struck.  Only 4 PAX braved the cold for a Christmas Eve beatdown.


SSH, Frankenstein, Baby Arm Circles (IC x 10)

5 Burpees OYO


The Thang

Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the AO

Not a PAX was stirring, not even Endo.

The burpees were finished in the cold grass with care

In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be here

The PAX were planking all cold on the ground

While visions of 20 monkey humpers danced in their heads

And Haka with his encouragement, and Vanelloppe the killer of men

Had just settled down with the PAX to do 20 plank jacks.

When just out of sight, there rose such a clatter

The PAX sprang from their plank to see what was the matter.

Away to the pull-up bars we flew like a flash

Sprinting vigorously, we completed the dash.

The concrete at the feet of the of winded PAX

Gave the luster of 10 in cadence smurf jacks

When, what to our wondering eyes should appear,

But Seltzer and 8 tiny exercises so near.

A little old Q, so lively and quick,

I knew in a moment, this must be a trick.

More rapid than eagles his courses they came,

And he whistled and shouted and called them by name.

Now Big Boy Situps (ICx10), now Mountain Climbers (ICx10), now Squats (ICx10), now 10 OYO Burpees

On Merkins (ICx10), on Side Straddle Hops (ICx10), on Lunges (ICx10), on Leg Raises (ICx20)

To the soccer Field, to the top of the wall

Now dash away, dash away, dash away all! (sprint to field)

So up to flag the PAX they flew

With a sleigh full of toys and big grin, too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the ground

The sound of feet as more mountain climbers (ICx10) came ‘round.

As we drew in our hand, and did 10 pickle pounds

Off the cart Seltzer came with a bound

He was dressed all in red, from his head to his foot,

His clothes were all tarnished, in sweat and dirt.

A bundle of toys, he had brought on his cart

He looked like a peddler just opening his pack.

His eyes, how they twinkled, his dimples how merry.

His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry.

His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow

And the beard of his chin was gray, oh no!

The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth

And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath

He had a broad face and a flat little belly

That shook when he laughed like a bowlful of jelly.

He was lean and mean, a right jolly young creature

And everyone laughed when they saw him,

he had the weirdest of features.

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head

Soon let me know, we had nothing to Dredd.

He spoke not a word, but went straight to work.

Laying out presents, then he turned with a jerk.

And laying a finger on his nose,

Giving a nod, and on the cart he rose.

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,

And away they all flew like the down of a thistle

But I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight



Gift Giving Time

Each PAX picked one of the “Gifts” left by Santa

Grouper–Cindy (100 Curls)

Tebow–Jump Rope (350 Reps)

Malware–Kettle Bell (100 High Pulls)

Cricket—Kettle Bell (100 Swings)

Belding–5 lb Dumbbells (100 baby arm circles)

Seltzer–Sandbag (Rows)


Each PAX performed their exercises. When compete SSH for the six.  Rotate until all 6 exercies complete.

Short Mosey around the block with a set of Bruce Lee mixed in


One more round of exercise back at the field (25 reps each)



Carolina Dry Dock

Skull Crushers


Front Plate raise


Final round of circle burp x 10.




Prayers for Tebow’s family recovering from illness and mourning the loss of his grandmother

Malware’s shipmate undergoing medical evaluation to remain active duty in the Navy

Those around us for a blessed holiday season.



Thanks to Seltzer for his help with setting up today’s beatdown and playing the role of St. Nick.